Abundant life of love

freely and lightly

2011-10-27T18:24:00.001-04:00

My church, Crossroads, is going through the Strong Challenge. I have to admit that I haven't been putting as much time and effort in as I had planned. One of the challenges this week was to memorize a passage of scripture. There were a few choices given, though I'm sure you could just pick your own. Of the four, one really stuck out to me; it was Matthew 11:26-30.

These verses aren't new to me; I've read them several times before but they still seem to impact me. Maybe that's because I haven't really let the words sink into my heart. I'm not sure, but either way I've decided to tackle this passage and commit the words to memory.

I chose The Message version of the Bible because it seems so fresh and breathes new life into this passage: "Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on Religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me-watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly."

Don't you just love that? I want to soak it all up. Yes, I'm worn out. Yes, I want you to show me how to take a real rest. I want to learn the unforced rhythms of grace. Show me how to live freely and lightly. Sign me up for that, Jesus.

check and check

2011-09-22T22:14:00.000-04:00

A little update on the ~~30 before 30 list~~ 30 while 30 list.

#9: Go on a hike
On a beautiful morning in August some friends and I ventured to Mt. Airy Forest for a quick hike. We had a blast trekking through the woods and getting away from the noise. The best part was finding a treehouse at our turnaround point.

#10: Go on a blind date
Surprise. So, this was kind of unexpected and it wasn't the typical blind date, but I'm counting it. A longtime family friend randomly texted me to ask if I was dating anyone. I wasn't. So, she said that she had a single guy friend in my age range that she'd like me to meet. My response, "sure, why not." Seriously, people.

How'd it go, you ask? It was fine. Fine is being nice. While he's a guy with some good qualities I definitely felt like we would never work.

I'm marking this off my list, but I'd still be up for giving this another shot.

fifty words or less

2011-09-22T21:32:00.000-04:00

I realized the other day that my profile/blog description is now outdated as I am no longer a twenty-something. It makes me wonder what has changed in the last five or so years since I created that little blurb.

My life was in a good place five years ago, surrounded by community and deep friendships. My nieces and nephew adored me. It was not without struggle, though. I'm wondering if I'd rather go back five years and do it all over again or if I'm glad that I'm on this side of thirty.

It doesn't really matter, I suppose, because I can't actually go back in time.

rubber meets the road...

2011-07-31T23:16:00.000-04:00

It's official: I'm thirty. Three-oh. XXX. Three decades.

How am I feeling, you ask? Well, to be honest, there have been a roller coaster of emotions lately but when I stop to think about the life I have I sense how incredibly blessed I am. "Blessed" is sometimes a hokey word, but it really is the word that describes what I'm feeling.

I'm guessing you're wondering about how I did on my list. Funny thing...I stopped caring along the way, or at least stopped caring as much, probably because I knew there was no way I could get done everything I had planned to do.

Anyway, here's the updated list, with updates in bold and/or crossed off:
1. Take a spontaneous road trip.
2. Pass the Series 7 Exam.
3. Lose 30 additional pounds.
~~4. Grow some of my own food.~~
~~5. Splurge on myself by buying something solely because I love it.~~
6. Host a game night.
7. Learn to bake bread from scratch.
8. Take some modeling photos.
9. Go on a hike.
10. Go on a blind date.
~~11. Invest in creating community.~~
12. Put pen to paper and express my love for someone. Mail the letter.
~~13. Be kind to someone that has caused me pain.~~
~~14. Grow in my forgiveness of x.~~ Somehow, without warning or effort, this has happened.
~~15. Take my nieces and nephew somewhere fun.~~
16. Commit to reading my Bible often.
~~17. Volunteer with an organization that I care about.~~
18. Create tree painting for my living room.
19. Take a dance class.
20. Cook an entire "from scratch" dinner.
~~21. Train Whisper.~~ He's kind of trained.
~~22. Blog at least once a month.~~ This barely happened. It felt like an obligation a few times, but I made it. I wish I put more effort in to blogging b/c I actually like writing down my thoughts and being able to go back to read them later.
23. Enjoy the sunrise over the Ohio, or somewhere more glamorous.
~~24. Travel somewhere new.~~ Isle of Palms, SC! It was gorgeous. There's a whole post about it in my head...hopefully it will make it to this page sometime soon.
25. Jog a mile. I have fallen off the proverbial wagon...time to jump back on.
26. Finish CD gift for my brothers that I started a long time ago. Ooops.
27. Use the envelope system again. I have the best of intentions. I'm half-heartedly doing the envelope system.
28. Change the Game. Live it. Some days are better than others, but it's small steps in the right direction.
29. Get a tattoo. Maybe. I'm kind of a wimp when it comes to pain.
~~30. Celebrate my 30th birthday. Enjoy it. Live it out.~~

Eleven out of thirty. Not quite what I was shooting for, but I'll take it. I'm thinking about rolling over all the unfinished items into a new list.

I'm going to end with this quote because it makes me happy and helps me realize that success is not in the checking off of boxes but in the everyday moments. Goodbye twenties; hello thirties, I'm ready for you, this is going to be good...

"To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children…to leave the world a better place…to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded." – Ralph Waldo Emerson

Take me out to the ball game

2011-07-04T22:21:00.000-04:00

Ball game is apparently two separate words or one separated by a hyphen. Who knew!? I'm officially crossing #15 off my list since I finally have the pictures on my computer to prove it.

We had gorgeous weather for the game and the kids were so excited! It was their first MLB baseball game and I'm so glad I was able to take them. They were really good. Okay, there was a little melt down because I wouldn't let them get both cotton candy AND snow cones. I feel no guilt, though, since I told them the rules up front. I almost caved. I can now understand why parents do. Seriously....they have cute little faces and you love 'em to pieces and all they want is a snow cone to make them happy.

Ryleigh is a little cuddle bug and hung on me the whole time. I didn't mind...I'm treasuring these little hugs for as long as I can get them. Scottie tried to be all independent, especially since he was the only boy in our group. And, Makayla showed a little bit of some sassiness, but I think she really enjoyed herself. I'd be lying if I said that it's hard to realize how much they're growing up. It's the epitome of bittersweetness. I adore them, but I'm afraid they'll want me around less and less in their lives and the thought of that kind of breaks my heart. Ahem (pull yourself together, Dana).

I love this first photo. We saw Rosie Red and the kids were super excited about it and I wasn't about to miss a photo op. So, we ran over to greet Rosie and even though she was motioning that she had to go up the stairs I managed to snap two quick photos.

The next photo was not long after the snow cone melt down and on our way back to the car. See, no one's crying so I totally think that's a WIN (which is good considering we got totally stomped by the Pirates. Boo.)

#15 is officially crossed off. :)

Click, click, click.

2011-06-04T15:42:00.000-04:00

There are a lot of amazing sites out here on the internet. Seriously. I'm kind of hooked; and in case I didn't already spill my dirty little secret I will now: I didn't do so well with following through on my lenten commitment to be online less often. I think I'm okay with that, or I'm in denial.

I thought I would share my current favorites with you. Then, I remembered that I had done this once before on my old blog. What is really bizarre is that post was exactly four years ago today. Creepy.

Anyway, here are my current top five, in no particular order:

1. Better After
I'm obsessed with this site and often do a rabbit trail to all the sites that get linked through. It's kind of ridiculous how much I love this site. I dream of being featured here. One day, my friends, one day.

2. Facebook
Facebook is like a bad habit that I just can't quit. It sucks up a whole lot of time. Time that I could be using for more productive things; instead Facebook paves the road to procrastination in my life.

3. Etsy
Oh yes. Etsy has made it on the list for the second time. And, I have to point out the fact that I was hip and in the know since I knew about Etsy four whole years ago. I'm cool like that. I share my coolness with you.

4. Craigslist
My house is filled with Craigslist finds. And, I couldn't be happier about it. I LOVE a good deal and you can find a lot of great deals on CL. Plus, I feel a little more "green" by going the whole used route. I'm sitting in my living room right now and I can count eight of the eleven pieces of furniture I have in here are from Craigslist. I would never been able to afford all new stuff when I bought my house.

5. Apartment Therapy
I won a $500 gift card from this site about a year ago, but my love started before then. The gift card was to Lowe's which is kind of hilarious because I was an orange apron girl at the time (home depot, if you didn't catch that). I got a lot of cool stuff with that $500 bucks. Anyway, Apartment Therapy has lots of great articles, tips and photos to help with decorating and other house-related things. They also have other sections of the site devoted to cooking, tech stuff, babies, etc. I used to think I wanted to be featured on their site, but people can be kind of harsh in the comment section and I'm not down with that.

It's funny that most of my favorites revolve around decorating and/or house related topics with the exception of Facebook. I've been thinking a lot about sharing more of my personal before and afters. If I could give up a little Facebook time maybe I could make that happen. Don't hold your breath, though, Facebook's like a drug. Look how many times I've ~~said~~ written Facebook within this little paragraph. A drug, I tell you.

Happy Clicking.

upside down and inside out

2011-05-26T20:46:00.000-04:00

No one tells you when you're a child that being an adult isn't much fun. Well, maybe they do but you don't believe them because you know when you're an adult you get to make all the decisions the way you want.

Pizza for breakfast? Ok.
Date that jerk of a guy? Sure.
Stay up til 2am even though you have to work? Of course.
Quit your job? Absolutely.

It's not that easy when you're an adult, or at least not when you try to be a responsible, level-headed, and compassionate adult. Many mistakes have been made and while sometimes it hurts like hell, I'm hoping that by continuing to love and trust and hope for something more that I'm going to be stronger for having walked through the experience.

One thing to remember: listen to the advice of your best friend...she'll tell you when that guy is a jerk and when to stay away. And, she'll hug you and love you even if you don't listen for the fifteenth time.

Momma said...

2011-04-15T21:03:00.000-04:00

...there'd be days like this.

Confessions of an almost 30 year old single woman:
Most of the time I enjoy my independence. I don’t have to check someone else’s schedule if I want to have an impromptu dinner with a friend or take a road trip on a whim or buy a cute pair of new shoes or eat the last of the ice cream. I have the freedom to quit my job and move to Africa right now (though, the planner side of me starts to freak out). Seriously, life is pretty good. But, I gotta be honest:

Some days are hard.

Today is one of those days for no particular reason. Or maybe there is a reason that’s been building up since the last time I let the confession reach the surface.

My checklist of the ideal mate has evolved over the last decade since I sure have learned a lot about life and about love, especially watching other couples navigate what is surely the most difficult and rewarding relationship one can have on earth.

Ultimately what it comes down to is I want someone to know me and to love me in spite of myself.

I want him to challenge me when I want to avoid the situation and run away. I want him to make me laugh as we dance through life together. I want him to hold me when things are hard and remind me that he isn’t going anywhere. I want him to give our kids piggyback rides through the house and make sand castles with them on the beach. I want him to see how hard I’m trying, how much I care. I want him to love people in an incredibly generous way with gentleness and gracefulness. I want him to build our family up in prayer knowing that Christ binds us together. I want to feel the warmth of his love. I want him to be full of integrity. I want him to seek justice and advocate for those that have no voice. I want him to know that this is a commitment, one that’s gonna involve some hard work and probably some slammed doors and tears every once in awhile. I want him to know that it’s worth it.

Oh, and I want him to kiss me. A lot.

one and only

2011-03-30T22:38:00.000-04:00

This is another name my Dad has for me. It wasn't until recently that I realized how much I love it.

Anywho, I bought the new Adele CD a few weeks ago and Whisper promptly chewed a few holes through it, but thankfully I had already uploaded (or is it downloaded?) all the songs to my itunes library.

I heart Adele. Seriously. That girl can belt it out. I've been listening to her "One and Only" on repeat (it's very different than what my Dad means when he calls me 'one and only' in case you were curious, but I dig it just the same.

Here are some lyrics:

You've been on my mind,
I grow fonder every day,
Lose myself in time,
Just thinking of your face,
God only knows why it's taken me so long to let my doubts go,
You're the only one that I want,

I don't know why I'm scared,
I've been here before,
Every feeling, every word,
I've imagined it all,
You'll never know if you never try,
To forgive your past and simply be mine,

I dare you to let me be your, your one and only,
Promise I'm worth it,
To hold in your arms,
So come on and give me a chance,
To prove I am the one who can walk that mile,
Until the end starts,

***
Good stuff, no?

Here's a bit of randomness for you...
Tonight's fortune cookie (I bought a bag in Chicago's Chinatown) reads:
"You are admired from afar"

What does that mean? How far is 'afar'? Is it across the room at Crossroads? Is it several states away? Is it Africa? C'mon, fortune cookie, don't leave me hanging like that.

ambitious, much?

2011-03-21T22:16:00.000-04:00

This list thing is tougher than I thought it would be. Well, that and other things are getting in the way of life (*coughworkcough*). My birthday is just over four months away, so I better kick it into gear.

Here's the updated list, with updates in bold and/or crossed off:
1. Take a spontaneous road trip.
2. Pass the Series 7 Exam.
3. Lose 30 additional pounds.
4. Grow some of my own food. Last week I sent in my application for a CSA share. I'm so excited. My mom is also planning to garden quite a bit this summer, but since she lives an hour away it will be hard to be there every week.
~~5. Splurge on myself by buying something solely because I love it.~~ I'm actually quite good at this. I am still very practical whenever I buy something though and that's what I was hoping for with this goal that I would just splurge without thinking about it much. I hosted a jewelry party last month and ended up getting a lot of gorgeous jewelry, so I'm crossing this one off the list.
6. Host a game night.
7. Learn to bake bread from scratch.
8. Take some modeling photos.
9. Go on a hike.
10. Go on a blind date.
~~11. Invest in creating community.~~ Out of the blue I had this great little idea of hosting a monthly dinner at my house for friends, family, etc. to come together. Not everyone has to know everyone, but I wanted to have a time to build community. So, on a whim I did it. There were only four of us for dinner, but I had a great time hanging out and am looking forward to the next dinner. I also have been a part of a group that meets to learn more about poverty and we're planning to continue our journey. And I meet with two other women at least once a month for a small group (they're lovely). When I wrote this one down I said that it is ongoing and it is, but I know it's something I try to do so I'm crossing this one off.
12. Put pen to paper and express my love for someone. Mail the letter.
13. Be kind to someone that has caused me pain.
14. Grow in my forgiveness of x.
15. Take my nieces and nephew somewhere fun. I can't wait to cross this one off the list! Well, technically I could go ahead and cross it off b/c I took one of my nieces and my nephew to the park last week.
16. Commit to reading my Bible often.
17. Volunteer with an organization that I care about.
18. Create tree painting for my living room.
19. Take a dance class.
20. Cook an entire "from scratch" dinner.
~~21. Train Whisper. Oy.~~ Yes, I'm crossing it off. He's not completely trained and I think this will be an ongoing thing for quite awhile, but he did "earn" his Beginner class certificate from training last week. I have a really cute picture I'll share later.
22. Blog at least once a month. I'm on track to make this one happen!
23. Enjoy the sunrise over the Ohio, or somewhere more glamorous.
24. Travel somewhere new.
25. Jog a mile. I have fallen off the proverbial wagon...time to jump back on.
26. Finish CD gift for my brothers that I started a long time ago.
27. Use the envelope system again. I'll wait until I'm at least two months in before I cross this one off, but I have started using the envelopes again.
28. Change the Game. Live it. Some days are better than others, but it's small steps in the right direction.
29. Get a tattoo. Maybe. I'm kind of a wimp when it comes to pain.
30. Celebrate my 30th birthday. Enjoy it. Live it out. Oh my gosh I'm so excited about my birthday party plans. I think it's going to be a blast. Details to come!

So, that's the update. Three crossed off, 6 in progress and a whole bunch more to start. I'll check back in later.

The whole "no facebook" thing is extremely difficult. I'm not doing so hot on that. I think there are some things in my life that I'm avoiding dealing with and spending a bunch of time online or doing other meaningless things helps me avoid them. *sigh* Guess I better try to figure out what those things are, huh? Sometimes being an adult kind of sucks. Sometimes it's fantastic! (like today when I ate a handful of chips with my PB&J whole wheat english muffin and no one could stop me.) ahem.

Day 1: Reflection

2011-03-09T22:16:00.000-05:00

This is the time of night where I typically waste time on facebook catching up on every status that I missed throughout the day. Instead, I'm sitting here after a very long and emotionally draining day of work and then a lovely dinner with good people that I like a lot so a great end to this day.

This day was a whirlwind, another day of "hanging on" at work. My friend's right; at some point it gets too tiring to keep "hanging on". I feel like that time is coming quicker than I'm ready for. If I had a way out right now, I think it wouldn't be much of a decision. It has left me wondering what is really holding me back. The easy answer is money. It isn't easy making it all work on one income with no support from anyone else. It all falls on my shoulders.

The biggest expense is of course my house. I LOVE my house and feel like it was a blessing, but I also know that if I were renting I would have more wiggle room as far as what kind of income I would require.

It's definitely something to at least consider.

With empty hands.

2011-03-07T23:17:00.002-05:00

My Dad has a nickname for me; it's busy-bee. You see, I'm good at staying busy. Busy-ness is not the same thing as being productive, and when it comes down to it, it simply isn't healthy. It creates this unbalance in my life and it's taking its toll on me. For the last several weeks I have been running from one thing to the next and when I do have a free moment at home I'm spending my time looking at time-wasting things online (facebook or blogs, anyone?). Instead of feeling truly connected with people I'm left feeling overwhelmed.

I wonder how much of this is attributed to our non-stop American culture that says to get ahead or fit it all in you can only sleep 5.5 hours per night because you simply have too much going on in your life for anything more. When I was working two jobs working very hard to make a goal happen it was a luxury to sleep more than 6 hours a night. Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do. Thankfully, that part of my life is behind me (hopefully forever). When I was in Africa last year it struck me that I liked being so disconnected from constant technology and was able to live more simply.

I'm being gently nudged that the time to rest has come. And, as much as I have been kicking and screaming to avoid this from happening it has come to the point where nothing sounds better than a vacation from the busy-ness of my every day life. Who wants to live with that thought?

I've been contemplating giving up facebook during Lent as a way to free up some time and let go of the hold that it has over me. Just in writing these words I've decided that my actions need to go a step further to address the actual problem instead of a symptom. I'm not entirely sure what that will look like, but I think it is time for me to release some things I've been holding onto. After all, someone once said that you can't receive anything new from God until you're holding out empty hands for God to fill them.

Here, God, are my empty hands for only you to fill.

Update on #21: Train Whisper. Oy.

2011-02-06T21:46:00.003-05:00

This is more of an update to the "Oy" part than the "train Whisper" bit.

I'm frustrated. Really the only one to blame is myself, but it's been a frustrating weekend with Whisper. I dearly love the little guy and the sentiment that I keep saying to him is, "it's a good thing you're so cute" but the cuteness factor is losing its luster. It's time to make some changes and follow through on what I've been saying for awhile now. He needs more play time than I can give him right now since it gets dark so early still. He needs some discipline and I need lots of help in setting up those boundaries and help with the follow through.

He pulls on his leash while going for a walk. He chews on everything. Seriously. He would put Tigger to shame with the bouncing. He's taken to barking frequently, and loudly. Generally, it's all part of having a puppy, but at some point he's got to grow up and that time, my friends, has arrived.

He doesn't know what he's in for (insert evil laugh).

By the end of February:
*Whisper will be joining Puppy Camp (doggy day care) for at least one day a week until Spring hits and we can get to the dog park during the week and more frequently.
*Whisper and I will be participating in some sort of structured training.

Oh, and while we're at it, let's do a quick rundown of Whisper related numbers:
3: number of people he has made bleed from "playing"
11: number of times he has pooped inside (most of this happened when I was sick and could barely function, let alone take a dog outside for extended periods of time)
6: number of leashes that have been chewed through
2: number of baseboards chewed
6: number pairs of ruined shoes
3: number pairs of gloves chewed

It doesn't end there, but for my sanity I should stop.

Donations accepted. Please make checks payable to me with "whisper fund" in the memo line.

p.s. I know you can't tell from this post, but I actually love the little guy. *sigh* Reminds me of Marley and Me and their "clearance puppy".

30 before 30

2011-01-15T13:19:00.005-05:00

It's no secret that I heart lists. I've been cultivating my "Life List" for the last month or so, whenever I have time to think about it. This morning I came across a blog post of "30 before 30". It's pretty self explanatory, but the idea is to compile a list of 30 things to do before you turn 30 years old. I've got about six months until my 30th birthday, so I'm gonna give it a shot. It's actually making me re-think my Life List. I may ditch that and continue an annual birthday list (31 before 31, 32 before 32, and so on).

This list is pretty ambitious, but here goes:
1. Take a spontaneous road trip.
2. Pass the Series 7 Exam.
3. Lose 30 additional pounds. (my goal is actually higher than this, but 30 is more realistic and it goes with the theme.)
4. Grow some of my own food. I'm hoping to join a CSA this year, but we'll see. Anyone interested in sharing a CSA share?
5. Splurge on myself by buying something solely because I love it.
6. Host a game night.
7. Learn to bake bread from scratch.
8. Take some modeling photos; This isn't because I want to be a model, but b/c I think it will push me out of my comfort zone.
9. Go on a hike. I actually kind of dig hiking, but I haven't done it much. Here's to more hiking in 2011!
10. Go on a blind date. I've never been on a blind date and while the thought is somewhat frightening, it is also a little exciting. Alright, friends, I guess I need your help on this one...be nice to me.
11. Invest in creating community. This is ongoing, but it's worth a slot on the list.
12. Put pen to paper and express my love for someone. Mail the letter. One of my goals of my life has always been to make sure that the people I love never have to question that I love them. I want to express that love in both words and actions, and often.
13. Be kind to someone that has caused me pain.
14. Grow in my forgiveness of x.
15. Take my nieces and nephew somewhere fun.
16. Commit to reading my Bible often. I'm contemplating the idea of a "read through the Bible in a year" type of thing.
17. Volunteer with an organization that I care about.
18. Create tree painting for my living room.
19. Take a dance class. I've secretly always wanted to be a great dancer. I'm not very graceful and my rhythm could use a little (a lot of) help. I can't believe I'm actually admitting this right now. 2011 is my year to be bold.
20. Cook an entire "from scratch" dinner.
21. Train Whisper. Oy.
22. Blog at least once a month.
23. Enjoy the sunrise over the Ohio, or somewhere more glamorous.
24. Travel somewhere new.
25. Jog a mile. I don't care how long it takes at this point, I just want to be able to do it without dying.
26. Finish CD gift for my brothers that I started a long time ago.
27. Use the envelope system again.
28. Change the Game. Live it.
29. Get a tattoo. Maybe. I'm kind of a wimp when it comes to pain.
30. Celebrate my 30th birthday. Enjoy it. Live it out.

I'm really glad I took the time to make this list. It took some restraint to not copy some cool things that other bloggers wrote, but I think this list is very authentic to who I am or at least the person I am growing into. The list is also indicative of some of the things I am currently pursuing. Things like facing fear, living with boldness, growing in confidence, pursuing forgiveness, creating community, loving people, and loving the life God has given me.

Over the next six months I'll update the list and maybe even expand on a few of the more ambiguous ones. Here's me giving you permission to hold me accountable. This is gonna be a great end to my twenties!!!

Saying it out loud...

2010-08-08T13:23:00.003-04:00

While we were in Mamelodi my friend Devon was relaying a story to me about a woman and a dream that she had that included doing something radical and new in her life. She told her friend to continue to say it out loud and tell people about it because that would make it more real, more attainable, less scary. Okay, so some of those might not have been her words exactly, but they were the words I took away from her story and what is incredibly relevant right now.

It’s been just over three months since I’ve been back from Mamelodi. If you’re looking from the outside you might not notice much has changed in my life, but I can tell you that it’s been a bit of a whirlwind and I’m on the cusp of some very big changes. I’m excited. I’m terrified. I’m hopeful. I’m uncertain. God’s bigger than all my hopes and He’s certainly bigger than all my fears.

Through the course of a conversation with a friend I blurted out that I would be doing missions full time if money didn't matter (and other fears didn't hold me back). I say blurted out because that is essentially what happened. It's the first time I ever admitted to myself or to anyone else verbally what I think I've been desiring for probably the better part of the last ten years. My immediate reaction was both emotionally and spiritually freeing. I had been holding this in for so long, not even fully aware because I had put so many other things in the way of this that I didn't think it was even possible.

The next step, as far as I can see right now, is to start doing some volunteering while looking for opportunities in the non-profit world. Ideally, I'd love to work with World Vision or CARE or similar organization, especially those that partner with Africa.

There's a lot more to this story, but I wanted to go ahead and say it all out loud and then I'll come back and fill in on all the details.

God's shaking up my world and when I surrender to what He has in store I find that it is exhilarating and even better than I could have imagined.

Whirlwind

2010-07-30T06:48:00.000-04:00

It's been three and a half months since I've returned from Mamelodi and I can tell you that it has been a whirlwind since that time. LOTS of things are happening in my life and honestly if I sit and think about the possibilities that are opening up for me I get really excited.

This is just a short little note to tell you that there is more to come and that I will be updating more frequently in the coming months. So, check back often. I promise to have a post up within the next week!

Dream Big!

Dumela!

2010-03-31T10:40:00.002-04:00

Hello from Mamelodi! Words are not coming quickly because the experience has been somewhat of a rollercoaster of emotions. God is good and I am blessed. I wanted to let you all know that I am safe and well and cannot believe some of the things I've seen and experienced.

The South African people have welcomed us with open arms and are teaching us many things. These people have faith that can move mountains; they are prayer warriors, relying on God for their livlihood.

Momma, I'm dancing! (I got your message last night and it made me cry. I love you.)

I hope to share more stories and experiences when I have more time. Thankfully, I'm getting ready to go take a nice hot shower to wash all the dirt off.

much love to each of you. keep praying!

p.s. happy late birthday, Scottie man...I didn't forget your birthday; I sent many well wishes your way.

in mere hours...

2010-03-24T22:29:00.003-04:00

...I'll be on a plane to Africa. I can hardly believe it. It's been weird saying goodbye to everyone; it seems surreal that I'm leaving. I'll make this post brief since I still have some last minute packing to do.

Jump over to the crossroads blog to keep up to date on the happenings in Mamelodi as they are happening.

I'll post some stories and photos when I return!

much love and joy!!!

~dana

In Awe.

2010-02-15T23:37:00.000-05:00

Less than a week ago I had $1600 left to raise for my upcoming mission trip to Mamelodi, South Africa. Today happens to be the deadline that they had set to have 100% of the trip paid for.

Let me attempt to recap the awesomeness of last week's fundraiser. A few weeks ago I decided that hosting a bake sale at my job would maybe yield some money towards my trip. So, the ideas started flowing. It would be incredible if I were able to use our lobby space during lunchtime, knowing I would get a lot more foot traffic that way. I made a few phone calls and was completely bummed when I was told, "NO, sorry, we don't do that sort of thing." I understand; I get it, but the disappointment was still there. I then asked if I could hold it on our HR floor, hoping that there would be more space and more chance for other people within the company willing to stop on that floor. Nope, not allowed. But, I was granted permission to use my floor's own breakroom to set up shop. Meanwhile, I had already sent out an email to several friends asking for help with baking and getting things together for the bake sale. Thankfully, finding friends willing to help proved much easier than finding a location.

One friend in particular was someone that I considered not asking because she is a new(er) mom, is busy, and I hadn't had the chance to see or talk to her in several months. She responded that she would gladly help and asked how the fundraising was going and I sheepishly replied that I still had $1600 left. She told me she would be donating and when she told me the amount, I was shocked...and humbled and incredibly grateful. A few days later she called to say that she had found some "extra" money for me in their budget and would be more than doubling their donation. This, my friends, is the power of God. I have no doubt of this. My friend is generous and a believer and her response to me when I was thanking her was this, "We love you and you are so brave and this is an amazing opportunity...thanks for the opportunity to make pretty valentine treats and give our money to something fantastic!"

Fast forward a couple of days to the day before the event, which was last week. Last week I worked Monday and Wednesday nights (making them 12+ hr workdays w/o commute time), was supposed to have a meeting on Tuesday night, and this left me with very little time to prepare in advance for the bake sale. Thursday was a very, very long night of baking. A few friends came over for a little bit and they were a huge help, but I ended up baking until the early hours of Friday morning, got just over four hours of sleep (this is not easy to do anymore!) after wrapping them all cute and loading my car.

I baked about two dozen brownies, 11 DOZEN cookies, baked and decorated 36+ cupcakes, and dipped some pretzels in chocolate. In the midst of my exhaustion, wondering if this would even be worthwhile I prayed something along the lines of this, "This is all I can do God. Meet me where I am and whatever happens is up to you."

Friday morning I arrived with bags in tow, with friends meeting me to help me unload my car with all the goodies. It was a sight to see! There was everything sweet a person could hope for and there was a lot of it! I wasn't sure if anyone would show up, let alone enough people to consume even half the amount of stuff we had. I had advertised the bake sale on all the floors my company occupies and tried to make the signs interesting and cute, letting them know this would be a great time to buy something sweet for Valentine's Day.

And, do you know what happened? People showed up. A LOT of people showed up. It was pretty much non-stop the entire time I was there. People were gracious and generous. People were curious about my trip and excited for me. There were people I had never met before giving me $20 donations and well wishes. A.MAZ.ING.

I bet you wanna know how much money we raised, don't ya?

Here's a look at the fundraiser by the numbers:

*84 cupcakes
*15+ DOZEN of FIVE varieties of cookies
*15+ bags of Oreo truffle balls
*meringue heart cookies
*10 bags of dipped pretzel rods
*4+ dozen brownies
*mini cupcakes
*key lime pie
*fundraiser coupon books (which, surprising I sold 5 of @ $20 each)

FOR A GRAND TOTAL OF:
$425 in cash donations and $65 in online donations

It would not have been the same (or even possible) without the help of my friends and family. The people in my life are amazing and this is just one example of that amazing-ness. Big props and thanks to Sarah, Ruthie, Laura, Lynn, Connie, Trina, Athena, Jill, Diane, and my dear Momma for baking and supporting me. HUGE thanks also to my prayer partners including, but not limited to: Jen, Christine, Tim, and Brendan.

I currently have only $320 left to raise since a few more donations have trickled in since the fundraiser. This is incredible. This is huge. This is only because of the power of God. Feeling full of joy, gratitude, and amazement (all of that and a few leftover cookies).

with love,
Dana

"He is able to do immeasurably more than all we can ask or imagine, according to HIS power at work within us." Ephesians 3:20

"Who do you say that I am?"

2010-02-07T12:15:00.005-05:00

That's the question that I'm asking now. I want to be intentional about how I spend my days; to live fully, with kindness and love and without fear and guilt. I want to learn what God has to say about the person that I am and how my passions and dreams can be lived out. It is going to take some time and effort to focus in on what those passions and dreams might be; but, I'm willing to do the hard work that is required.

I fully expected to post on this blog a lot more frequently and I want to commit to doing that very thing for the time I have left before leaving for Mamelodi. March 25th is only 45 days away now; I'm hopeful that I will be able to have a clearer focus now.

Since I'm a list-maker I'll go ahead and share a few of the things that I have planned to give the space in my life to make this growth possible. It's my way of showing up and having God meet me where I am being faithful to what He has for me. He won't love me any more or any less by what I am doing. This is more about me being able to take hold of the things He has for me, the things He wants to teach me, the things He wants me to do and be about. I'm letting go of my feeble attempt to control the things in my life.

*Read the Bible (I know, right?) I'm thinking I'll choose a topic each week and focus on that (beauty, freedom, grace, love, the poor, etc)
*Read "Godric" by Frederick Buechner
*Read "Free" by Brian Tome
*Listen to Dan Miller's podcast, 48 days to the Work You Love
*Journal my thoughts
*Be aware that my words and actions portray someone and is that someone the person I want to be
*Be active and intentional in participating in the all-church journey about Freedom

I fully believe and expect things to happen now that I am choosing to not sit and let the days continue with hardly a thought as to how I used my time. It's going to be great to look back and see the changes!

"Who can tell where days begin, when waking up means slowly caving in.
And still you haunt me through faded sheets, like the memory of what I used to be.
Give me back what I can feel
Give me something real"
~Something Real by Ashley Peacock

these days

2009-12-01T20:34:00.007-05:00

Days swiftly fade into nights only to awake again with the sun as a new day begins. It feels like these days are slipping through my fingers with barely a memory to hold their place.

Last week we celebrated Thanksgiving and with recent events in my life I am reminded how precious and fleeting life on this Earth can be. I am so thankful for the people in my life. Memories flood my mind when I start to think of all the people that surround me. It doesn't seem enough to simply say a simple prayer of thanksgiving for my friends and family, yet it is something I am glad to do. I have been given so much and I am so grateful for what I have. Let me not forget or ever cease being thankful.

I am also thankful for the opportunity to travel over 8,000 miles to another continent to share a piece of myself with others. I will be going March 25 through April 10, 2010; my portion of the trip is $4500, which includes airfare, transportation, housing, etc. I would be so grateful if you considered a financial gift towards my trip. Even a small donation makes a huge difference.

Here’s how you can donate:
To make a tax-deductible contribution, go to
http://www.crossroads.net/gomamelodi

Click on the donate tab and type in my last name to make a secure donation.

If you prefer to write a check, please make it payable to Crossroads and put my name and Go Mamelodi 2010 in the memo. You may either give it to me in person or put it in the mail.

Thank you for joining me on this journey. I know that March will be here sooner than I think is even possible, so I'm hoping to take a few moments to enjoy the adventure as much as I can.

It's official!!

2009-11-05T22:52:00.005-05:00

The email confirmation came yesterday afternoon and excites me to no end. It said that I'm part of the Go Mamelodi 2010 trip for the week I selected (I actually selected to go for BOTH weeks). You don't even know how many exclamation points I'd like to be using right now (yayay!!!!!!).

So many things to think about, so many things to do to prepare for this trip. Many more posts will come about all those things I'm thinking about and all the preparations that need to be made.

Somebody just pinch me because this feels a bit surreal and I'm sure that when I set foot in Africa it will feel even more surreal. I remember that feeling very vividly seven years ago when I went to England. I remember thinking (and saying repeatedly to Jen), "I can't believe I'm in England!!"

So excited to be/do/love/hope for something bigger than myself. more to come soon...

there's far too much to see...

2009-10-27T21:42:00.004-04:00

Tonight I went to the info session about the Mamelodi trip and I'm having a hard time trying to contain my excitement. I mean, the excitement has gradually been building, but I don't think I can remove this grin from my face. I am well aware that there are going to be difficulties to overcome before, during and after this trip but I am filled with a sense of hope and an undeniable joy.

This is what God has for me; I wholeheartedly believe that.

As I was getting this post together Ellery's song Perimeter of Me came on my itunes and the words are eerily appropriate:

"And I want to live with wider eyes,
There's far too much to see
To think of nothing else
But where I've been and where I'll be
I've been longing for the freedom
That is waiting silently
In the life that's just beyond the small
Perimeter of me"

So, if you're the praying type I have a few things that would be helpful for you to pray over:

*I'll be able to go for both weeks
*I'll be able to connect with my GO group in an amazing way
*the people we'll be connecting with both here and in Mamelodi
*raising financial support (more on this later, but my portion of the trip will be $4500)
*my relationship with God as I continue this journey
*my family

much joy to you,
dana

soak in the last line

2009-09-07T11:49:00.001-04:00

The Summer Day

Mary Oliver

Who made the world?
Who made the swan, and the black bear?
Who made the grasshopper?
This grasshopper, I mean-
the one who has flung herself out of the grass,
the one who is eating sugar out of my hand,
who is moving her jaws back and forth instead of up and down-
who is gazing around with her enormous and complicated eyes.
Now she lifts her pale forearms and thoroughly washes her face.
Now she snaps her wings open, and floats away.
I don't know exactly what a prayer is.
I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down
into the grass, how to kneel down in the grass,
how to be idle and blessed, how to stroll through the fields,
which is what I have been doing all day.
Tell me, what else should I have done?
Doesn't everything die at last, and too soon?
Tell me, what is it you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?

My heart for Africa

2009-08-11T22:37:00.000-04:00

Much like affection for a deeply loved friend, my heart for Africa continues to grow. One of the first times I remember feeling compassion for the people of Africa was when I heard about the devastation AIDS was having on the country and Bono's response to it. I was glad that someone was doing something about it, but didn't know if or what I should be doing. A few years ago my friend was going to be in charge of getting donors to sponsor children through Compassion International and had several of the packets at her house. Of course I had to look through them and I knew that if I sponsored a child, I would like them to be from Africa. I flipped through the children’s packets and came upon a bright, smiling face of a young girl from Tanzania. She seemed so sweet and so deserving of love and a chance at life. I decided to partner with Compassion International and sponsor that beautiful young girl named Beatrice.

Fast forward a few years...I have been attending Crossroads for a few years now and LOVE it (there will be a future post on how it has changed my life). For the last few years Crossroads has partnered with a church in Mamelodi, South Africa called Charity and Faith. Several trips between the two churches have already taken place and from the time I heard about it, I have wanted to go.

There is something amazing about mission trips. Traveling somewhere to be intentional about serving people and loving on people is maybe my idea of doing the things God has given me passion for all wrapped up into one. Wow. I had never even realized that until I wrote that sentence. These kinds of trips are not easy, for sure, but my past two experiences have proven to be life changing and nearly indescribable. It has been far too long since I've taken a trip like this.

I knew that the desire to go was already within me, but I wasn't sure how it was all going to come to fruition. Brian Tome (the Sr. pastor) recently said, "Most of the time when God puts a call on your life it’s simply something you know that God would approve of and you just have to do it." That resonated within me and a few days later I went to Crossroads to attend an info session on Mamelodi and the upcoming trips. My mind had pretty much already been made up and this was only confirmation that I wanted and felt that I needed to be a part of the Go Mamelodi 2010 trip.

This is only the beginning of the journey for me; I hope you'll join me in some way. I'll be updating this blog probably a bit randomly at first, but more and more often as the trip draws near. Thanks for your charity in reading!

~With much love,
Dana

For last year's recap video check this out; my heart for her continues to grow.